Sam Pickett ‘21: Junk Food Connoisseur
Sam Pickett is the Columns Editor at Law Weekly.
Hi Sam! Welcome to the Hot Bench! Our readers have heard a lot from you as a journalist over the years, so I’d like to switch up our usual questions to probe deeper into what makes Sam tick. But first, tell us where you’re from and why you decided to become a lawyer?
I am from Indiana (crossroads of America, baby!!!) and, in one of the few serious answers I’ll give, I decided to become a lawyer, among other reasons, because of a desire to fight injustice. I feel that so often people are taken advantage of because they don’t know the law or how to maneuver within our legal system and being a lawyer gives me the opportunity to help people in a way that few other careers can.
Okay now the hard stuff, why is popcorn the best vegetable?
Easy, it comes from corn, which comes from Indiana, which is where I’m from. Also, you can put whatever toppings you want on it—it can be sweet or savory (like me)—and you can eat tons of it without feeling bad. Why eat lots of broccoli or carrots when you could eat a bunch of popcorn?
If you were reincarnated as a dinosaur, would you rather have a spiky tail or thiccasaurus thighs, and why?
I’ve got to go with the spiky tail. If I were really committed, I could have thiccasaurus thighs right now. But a spiky tail? I can only dream of that. Plus, I would be able to smack people I don’t like, a huge advantage. Thick thighs would make me strong, yes, but not allow me to smack people as easily.
Have you actually been productive during 3L? if yes, why?
While I certainly don’t feel productive, I am in the Immigration Law Clinic, so I’ve had to maintain a certain level of productivity. As a 3L, however, I am more inclined to “call that a day’s work” at 2:00 p.m. and to avoid any kind of responsibility for the rest of the evening. Thank god TikTok didn’t take off until my 3L year.
Who is your favorite power ranger?
The red one. I don’t remember why, but red is my favorite color, so I think that’s a safe bet.
When you look in the mirror, what’s the first word you think of?
It depends on the day. Somedays, it is something loathsome. Others, it is something uplifting. There is no in between.
What flavor of ice cream are you on a Tuesday?
Cookie Dough (not chocolate chip cookie dough, that’s important), because it is delicious, but it’s not my favorite flavor. Similarly, Tuesday is a fine day, but not my favorite day.
Would you rather be the physicist Pickett, war general Pickett, or a picket fence?
Given that General Pickett fought for the Confederacy, I think it is a safe bet that I would rather be the physicist. Plus, in the 1996 Nobel Prize citation of physicist David Lee, credit was given to Pickett and his research group for their work on 3He. That’s pretty sick.
Being a picket fence, however, would be pretty nice given that I would no longer have to deal with the crushing burden of existing. I could just sit there, look pretty, and protect shrubbery from predators. I would love that for me.
If you were a kitchen appliance, which one would you be?
Definitively a blender. Like a blender, I’m multifaceted and serve a broad range of functions and, sometimes, I can be very loud. No, I will not explain further.
What would your “real housewife” catch phrase be?
“I’ve always had opinions, but now people know it”—me, discussing my time at the Virginia Law Weekly.
Who is your ‘spirit’ Supreme Court Justice?
Justice Rehnquist, not because of his opinions, which I generally don’t agree with, but because I heard he hated writing opinions, and I can relate to that level of not wanting to even do the bare minimum.
It’s the end of the world, what four other people would you pick to be on your apocalypse survival team?
Weirdly enough, I’ve thought about this before. I am assuming that I can have fictional characters, even though that was not in the prompt:
(1) Rick Grimes—This man literally dealt with the apocalypse. You need a steady captain and even though Rick could be super (I mean really, really) annoying in the Walking Dead, he is a good leader, and I think I could balance out some of his psychopathic tendencies enough to make him a valuable choice.
(2) Legolas—He’s quiet, great with a bow, and kind. What more could you want?
(3) The Mountain—Sometimes you just need some brute strength to protect your squad. His blind loyalty and viciousness could be very useful if we got in a fight with another team.
(4) Dr. House—I haven’t seen many shows with doctors, but I have seen House. Who knows what kind of weird diseases would appear in an apocalyptic world? We need a doctor to help keep the team in tip top shape. If he got annoying, we would simply tape his mouth shut. And if he limps, the Mountain will carry him. Although come to think of it, the Mountain will also probably be carrying me too (a la Bran Stark).
If you could change the ending to one TV show or book, what would you change? Spoiler alert.
The end of Game of Thrones. God, what a horrible ending. What would I change? Everything, but most of all Dany would NOT have gone insane. Or if she had, she would’ve killed Jon Snow. Jon Snow is, in my humble opinion, the absolute WORST. He is always moping around and talking about honor—like dear god, man, lighten up for just one scene. And Bran being the king? Absolutely not. And Tyrion should’ve been killed after he turned on Dany. Also, at least one major character should’ve died at the Battle of Winterfell. But one thing I wouldn’t have changed? Arya killing the Night King. That was awesome.
Knowing what you do now, would you go back in time to still come to law school?
Absolutely. Law school is very hard, but I have met some truly incredible people, particularly my wonderful girlfriend Maria, and learned a lot about myself. I often feel very fortunate to have so enjoyed law school.
Would your five-year-old self think of you as being cool, a nerd, or not recognize who you’ve become?
A: I think my five-year-old self would think that I was cool, but I’m not even sure what I think five-year-old me thought twenty-five-year-old me would be like. I think twenty-five seemed so old that I was like “I won’t ever be twenty-five.” But here I am, being twenty-five, and while I don’t feel cool, at least now I can rent a car?
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